10 Things you have to explain to out-of-towners about Miami

Everybody -or almost anyone- knows Miami. By pictures, stories, or movies and TV series... but the reality is different: here you'll find out things you didn't know...

1. Miami and South Beach are two completely different worlds.

South Beach is what you see on The Real Housewives. Miami is what you see on The First 48.

2. Nothing will ever start on time.

Oh… you thought that “8pm” meant show up at 8? No… that means get in the shower at 9.

3. You’re not going to be using public transportation.

That train we have, like so many people in Miami, is purely decorative.

4. People will assume you speak Spanish, even if you look like Mason Plumlee.

If you get lost when Dexter doesn’t use subtitles, you won’t make it out of the airport.

5. We don’t stop for pedestrians, even at crosswalks.

So watch out for the Lamborghinis... specially the gold one!!

6. Nobody EVER goes out on Ocean Drive.

And if we do, it’s to prove to visitors that those 3-for-1 drinks are really $28 each!

7. It might rain all day.

Sure, it might be only for an hour. Or you might end up on vacation in London with humidity. And newer buildings. And speaking Spanish.

8. Just because the sun is down doesn’t mean it’s getting cooler.

Our average low temp in the Summer is 79, so that “light jacket” you brought is just another layer you’ll have to wear home to avoid JetBlue’s checked bag fee.

9. We eat at 7… or before…

This is a BIG challenge for Latin-Americans!

10. Those enormously jacked dudes over there? Those impeccable dressed dudes over there with the long hair?

The jacked dudes? They’re… um… probably not interested in girls. The ones with long hair? They’re not either... or are they? Tough call.

Even after all of this... Miami is a

paradise 365 days a year!

By Matt Meltzer